I finally found the language for how I work.
For a long time, I felt slightly out of step with how marketing and visibility are often talked about.
Not because I didn’t understand the advice.
I did.
Post more.
Be consistent.
Stay visible.
Push your message ahead.
I followed those rules when I needed to. I learned them. I respected them.
But something about them never settled in my body.
It wasn’t resistance.
It was misalignment.
Recently, I realized I didn’t lack discipline or clarity — I lacked language.
Now I have it.
I work in pull energy, not push energy.
I prefer to choose when I engage, and I prefer to create in ways that allow others to choose too. I like content people seek out intentionally, not content that arrives uninvited. I trust resonance more than reach. Presence more than pressure.
This shows up everywhere in how I move:
- I gravitate toward platform-based writing rather than inbox delivery
- I use text and silence instead of talking to the camera
- I walk ideas into clarity rather than forcing output
- I create slowly, letting things find their moment
For a long time, I questioned this.
Was I avoiding growth?
Resisting sales?
Making things harder than necessary?
What I see now is simpler.
Push strategies aren’t wrong — they’re just more visible.
They dominate conversations because they’re louder, easier to measure, and faster to scale. That doesn’t make them universal. It just makes them familiar.
Pull energy exists too.
It’s quieter.
It responds instead of initiates.
And because it doesn’t shout, it often goes unnamed.
The more I sat with this, the more it reminded me of how growth works in nature.
An acorn doesn’t push itself into becoming an oak tree.
It doesn’t announce its growth or force its timing.
It holds everything it needs — and pulls what’s required from its environment when the conditions are right.
That’s how I work.
This isn’t a rejection of marketing.
It’s an understanding of self.
Finding language for this hasn’t changed how I move — it’s helped me trust how I already do.
Like an acorn, I trust what’s already inside me to know how to grow
Reflection Prompt
Where in your work or life are you pushing simply because it’s visible? What shift if you trusted a quieter, more natural way of growing?
Author’s Note
This reflection came from noticing my own resistance — not to marketing itself, but to how loudly it’s often framed.
Writing this helped me realize something important. I wasn’t doing anything wrong. I was simply working in a way that aligns with my nature. Naming that brought relief, clarity, and a deeper trust in my rhythm.
I’m sharing it here for anyone who has felt similar but didn’t yet have the words.
If this reflection resonated with you, follow Sweet N Social for more stories. Explore creativity, build confidence, and find your rhythm in everyday moments.
If you want the audio version of these insights, join me on Confident Strides: The Podcast. Every story becomes a moment in motion there.
By Tonia Tyler | #ConfidentStrides | Sweet N Social
“Success is something you attract by the person you become ” ― 
During basic training, the instructors emphasized the need for having a “battle buddy”. They were essentially your accountability partner throughout our eight weeks of training. Your battle buddy was the one who help keep you motivated and focused. I have found that a “battle buddy” is not only necessary in the military but also throughout our journey called life. Your “battle buddy” may or may not be your best friend but they will always be the one to go the extra distance with you.
The hardest thing to do is to simply get started in whatever you want to do. Often we feel like we have to do everything “just right” in order to start, but that’s not often the case. The more you work on whatever you do, the better it gets over time. Remember that most of us learned to ride a bike with training wheels and as we got better, the wheels eventually came off. When you wish to start something new, it’s okay to use training wheels.
Life will offer up an answer to our prayers but not send it the way we expect it. Here is another way to look at it, we ask for a ride to our desired destination but because we don’t like the vehicle choice to get there, we turn down the ride. Keep in mind, the main objective is to get from point A to point B.
It takes courage and a bit of risk to step outside your comfort zone. That is why a strong “why” is so important to have. The “why” is what will make the most daunting tasks worth doing. A strong “why” is what will give you the gas to keep going on days when you feel empty. A strong “why” is what makes the struggles worth while. Make sure you write down your “why” and review it as often as possible. Why? Because it’s important to know.
Creating a new habit is simply taking a wish, writing it down, committing action to accomplish it over and over again. Once it takes root, you develop a “craving”. These cravings are what pulls you towards your future. The power to choose your future is in your hands. Habits are nondiscriminatory so they can work for you or against you. So choose wisely.
I stopped sharing most of my dreams with others not because I don’t think that they will not support me, but in actuality, their form of support is not helping but rather hindering success. I had someone say to me “be careful because things might not work out the way you want them to and you’ll get disappointed.” I thought to myself, isn’t that called life?
What I love about the new year is that it always brings new opportunities. There is always a sense of excitement and enthusiasm that is just so powerful. This is the time to set your goals and establish positive habits that will help sustain you throughout the year to meet those goals. My wish for everyone during this coming year is lots of happiness, personal growth and abundance.
When you do what you love and love what you are doing with a sense of style and confidence, you are creating a legacy that separates your from the rest. No one can do things the way you do so don’t be afraid the let your style shine through. To be authentic is to be yourself.
Sweet N Social 
