Sweet N Social

Tag: awareness is key

  • The Grumbles

    The Grumbles

    Some of my hardest “NO” have been said to others in order to say “YES” to myself.  I used to get mad and frustrated when people would always ask for favors. I would wonder why was the only one they seemed to call, and get pissed off about it.  Those were little grumblings trying to get my attention.  The one person I did not seem to get mad with was myself. It was ME who made these people feel comfortable in asking because I was the one always saying yes.  I started noticing the feeling that were generated when I would say yes and realized I was the one who had all of the control.

    I love the quote by Les Brown who says “if you like what you are getting, keep doing what you are doing”  I did not like what I was getting. When I said yes to others, I was saying not to my happiness.  I am definitely not saying that we should not help others but sometimes you have to step back and really examine what you are saying yes to.  Are you helping or are you enabling?  There is a difference.

    Take time out before committing to anyone whether you are helping or enabling that person. For me, once I learned the difference, I decide more carefully what I will say “YES” to.  The grumbling deep down inside yourself is trying to tell you something. Take a moment to listen.

     

     

  • It’s Time to Donate

    It’s Time to Donate

    For many years I had adopted the habit of clearing out my closet in order to make room for the winter clothes by putting the summer clothes in storage bins and pulling out the the old winter clothes. I know this is a common practice for many of us. I would go out and buy extra hangers and hold onto clothes that no longer fit me, not to mention were out-dated. It was a habit I picked up watching my mother do for years.

    It wasn’t until I realized that this practice was an old unconscionable belief that perpetuated from a scarcity mindset. I would justify holding on to things with the “just in case” mentality. I stated in “Seasons of Change“, we have to clear out some of our old thoughts and ideas in order to prepare for the new season. I still believe it’s true but what I would like to add is pay attention to your thoughts, feelings and actions. Awareness is the key. And if you ever find yourself thinking “I need to buy more hangers”, it just might mean it’s time to donate.

  • Goal Analysis

    Goal Analysis

    Like so many people, I struggle with getting things done, especially if it makes me feel like work to me.  It’s a real struggle especially when I retired from the military years ago.  I battle with laziness.  I know if I can admit it, I am recognizing it, and ultimately I can change it. Like a cost analysis, I assess my productivity by conducting a goal analysis.  Its simple. Let me explain.

    On many occasions for instance, I love to run to my favorite book buying spot to browse the books. I use browsing loosely because I can always find something to buy.  I have many books at home, not to mention a library reading list that will definitely take time to read through. What I have to do for myself is redirect my impulse to run to the store towards something that will actually get me closer to creating a legacy for my family.  I know that just buying more books will not get me there.

    Awareness is the first key to conducting my analysis.  I ask myself this: “is what I want to do going to get me closer or father away from my goal?” If the answer is no, the next question is: “what action can I do right now, that will?” I realize it just a simple matter of redirecting my energy and focus into more productive activities that will get me closer to what I want to achieve in life rather than what I want to buy throughout life.

  • What’s Not Working Here?

    What’s Not Working Here?

    I love to read personal development books! What I have to pay close attention to is getting sucked up in do all of what the author is recommending.  Like so many things out there, these books are recommendation that the author has shared with the reader.  It’s their life, their research or their opinions.  You still have to put action behind your own purpose and dreams in order for them to come to fruition.

    I am a firm believer in personal development but I am also a firm believer in creating a life of your own design. I take bits and pieces of the knowledge I read, and use what works and discard what doesn’t.  Reading does expand your thought pattern but if your not careful, you’ll begin to live the life of the author and not your own.

    I would never not recommend reading, I just recommend paying attention to how the book is making you feel.  If its not helping you but stressing you out, step back, breathe and see what’s working and discard whats not.