“Know the rules well, so you can break them effectively.” ― Dalai Lama XIV
Quora Question: How did you force yourself to stick to healthy habits?
The very first thing I did was determine what I wanted to create and then I set up rules that would protect my habit until it could “feed” itself.
For instance, when I started my walking habit, my main objective was to find peace during a chaotic period of my life. I had always enjoyed playing and being out in nature while I was growing up. I found peace and happiness so when I needed to find peace, I went back to the one thing I knew would give me that. A walk in the park. I never set out to become a “walker” it just felt right and natural. Nine years later, I still find peace and happiness out on the trails.
I would never encourage anyone to “force” themselves to do anything. I think the biggest success comes from knowing your why first and trusting the process as it unfolds. You can still set up “rules” like I will do two sit-ups during a commercial break, or I will drink water first thing in the morning, but these are ways to help you stay in alignment with your WHY.
Another influence that helps you stay on course is taking each day one step at a time. Start small and let the motivation of each win carry you forward. A few months into my walking journey, I started paying attention to the kinds of food I was eating. After a great walk, I didn’t want to ruin it by eating a burger and fries. I slowly added salads to my diet.
No one likes to be pushed around so why would you want to do that to yourself?
As humans, we are designed with “three chairmen”, the mind, body, and spirit connection. When they are in sync, you become unstoppable by simply deciding. Get clear about your WHY and opportunities to help you achieve your goal will pop up on your mental radar.
Here are some things to consider when implementing “rules”
- If you know the rules, then you know how to break them too especially if we are the ones who made them in the first place. Rules serve a very important role when first establishing a new habit, but if they remain checked, they can also become the very thing that hinders your growth.
- Consider rules like a baby’s crib, they serve to protect your habit but eventually we will outgrow them. It isn’t until you want to create or break a habit that you realize just how much our rules have an influence on our behavior.
- Realize that with everything that is worthwhile in having, it needs time and space to cultivate. By adding this new habit, consider what you need to prepare for it to grow. For example, readers look for time to read even perhaps create a special corner or buy a special reading chair to ease their mind for reading mode.
- What will help trigger your habit? Like I mentioned above, commercial breaks can be your trigger to do push-ups or sit-ups. This reminds me of the time when I was in the military, and we were preparing for an upcoming fitness test. Our commanders would post signs like “do 20 push-ups” on Post-It-Notes on their doors. If you entered their office, you had to do what was posted on the note. It made it kind of fun especially when the whole company was involved.
- Keep it fun. Creating habits does not have to be forced. Get your family or friends involved to help you stay on track. Celebrate the wins and keep track of your progress. Seeing progress is another great way to keep you going.
- Last and certainly not least, give yourself grace. The fact that you made the decision to change is the most important decision of all. Remember, if it was easy, everyone would do it!
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Quote Source: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/rules
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My relationship with my children improved. Last summer, I implemented a mandatory “unwind time” for everyone. It was something very similar to a tech-free time out, no electronics, cell phones, TV or radio for two hours each night during the weekday. During the two hours, we would play card games, take walks or just simply sit outside on the deck and talk. I must admit, I had trouble turning off the phone in the beginning but as time went on; the kids would come and sit down in the living room without being called to join in. They actually looked forward to hanging out with me again.
I know now that I have the power to make better and smarter choices for the kind of life I wish to live. I learned that no one can steal your joy when it comes from deep within. 
One year ago today, I was involved in a car accident. It was a rainy Halloween night, so we didn’t have many “trick or treaters” come to the house. I didn’t have to rush out to pick up my husband from work that night, and since it was raining I knew I had to take a little extra time to make it there. Before I got on the highway, I was on my cell phone talking with a friend and I remember saying I needed to get off and concentrate on the road. She said be safe!
I was checked out by the EMT’s and then placed in the police car until the tow truck showed up. As I sat in the police car, a calming presence came over me and I knew everything was going to be alright.
Most of the time they are on the pond or on the lake. On a few occasions these birds are close to the walking trail or crossing it. As I come up on them, my heart starts racing and fear of them attacking me comes to mind.
My names are not meant to be harmful to these birds in any way. My names are meant as a visual reference for the fears generated in my mind. Instead of the sign saying “Caution Feeding Wildlife Can Be Harmful” I see “Caution Feeding Your Fears Can Be Harmful. For instance, in the picture above, I would name these birds confusion, worry, criticism and doubt. By giving the geese these names, I started learning to recognize the emotions that fear generates inside. By feeling and accepting the racing heart beat and the nervousness that arises, I recognize these are feelings of fear. It’s not that the fear will disappear, it is the fact that I have to feel the fear, breathe and keep on moving.
Sweet N Social 
