Somewhere along the way, we started equating “busy” with “purposeful.”
Lately, I’ve been asking myself a question. What if the goal isn’t to do more? What if we aim to do less with greater meaning?
During my walk today, I thought about how easily we overload our lists. We often stretch our energy across too many things.
When everything is a priority, nothing truly is.
So I stopped mid-step, looked at the path ahead, and asked: What’s the one thing that really matters today?
The answer was quiet but clear.
What Simplicity Taught Me Today
Simplifying your goals doesn’t mean lowering your standards. It doesn’t mean limiting your dreams. It means focusing your energy where it counts.
When we strip away distractions, our true goals become clear. These are the goals aligned with our values. They are the ones that move us ahead with peace instead of pressure.
Every big achievement is built on simple, intentional steps.
The goal is progress, not perfection — direction, not speed.
Reflection Prompt
Look at your current goals — personal, professional, or spiritual. What feels heavy or forced?
Now ask: Which one goal aligns with my peace, not just my productivity?
Focus on that for the week ahead and notice how your energy shifts.
Keep Walking
Next, we’ll explore how simplicity creates space for inspiration and new ideas in Day 6 — Simplicity Sparks Creativity.
Join the Walk
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Share your moment of clarity with #ConfidentStrides #SweetNSocial #SimplicityIsPowerful.
Author’s Note
Written during a midday walk when the to-do list felt endless — until I remembered peace has its own priorities.
#ConfidentStrides | #SweetNSocial | Written by Tonia Tyler
Before you go, you’re invited to take the free Kahoot! Self Study, Interactive Reflection Quiz inspired by today’s post.
The trees outside my window are starting to change again.
One leaf, then another, letting go without resistance — no fight, no regret, just rhythm.
It made me wonder: what would it look like to release my own “leaves” that no longer serve me? An outdated routine, a worn-out worry, or maybe even the need to hold everything together.
We spend so much energy clutching the familiar. This happens even when it’s no longer fruitful. We forget how freeing release can be.
What Simplicity Taught Me Today
Letting go isn’t weakness. It’s wisdom.
It’s the quiet strength of knowing when something has run its course. It is trusting yourself enough to move ahead without it.
Grace comes when we stop labeling release as loss. We can start seeing it as space. It is space for peace, creativity, or the next version of who we’re becoming.
The truth is, simplicity often begins not by adding something new, but by releasing what no longer fits.
Reflection Prompt
What are you still carrying that’s weighing you down — mentally, emotionally, or physically?
Take a deep breath. Picture yourself setting it down, even just for a moment.
Notice how your body feels when you do.
Sometimes the first step to peace is permission to let go.
Keep Walking
Next, we’ll explore how simplicity helps you refine your focus. It helps you realign your goals in Day 5 — Simplify Your Goals.
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Share your moment of release with #ConfidentStrides #SweetNSocial #SimplicityIsPowerful.
Author’s Note
Written after watching leaves fall outside my window — a reminder that nature doesn’t rush or resist its seasons. It simply lets go.
#ConfidentStrides | #SweetNSocial | Written by Tonia Tyler
Before You Go
Before you go, you’re invited to take the free Kahoot! Self Study, Interactive Reflection Quiz inspired by today’s post.
(A behind-the-scenes reflection from Day 2 — Clearing Mental Clutter)
That sunrise in Cabo San Lucas will always stay with me.
It was my first girl’s trip — the kind that promised laughter, connection, and warm ocean air. But somewhere between the sunrise and the catamaran, it became more than a vacation.
Standing on the sand that morning, I watched the sun rise from the water. I realized how long it had been since I simply watched something without analyzing it. No plans. No to-do lists. Just breath and light.
Later that day, stretched out on a catamaran, the waves did what words couldn’t. Their rhythm matched my heartbeat. My thoughts slowed down, not because I forced them to, but because I finally let life lead for a while.
That trip reminded me: clearing mental clutter isn’t about fixing or organizing every thought. Sometimes, it’s about trusting that peace knows how to find you — especially when you stop chasing it.
Reflection Prompt
When was the last time your mind truly quieted down? What helped — the place, the people, or simply giving yourself permission to rest?
Read the full reflection from Day 2 — “Clearing Mental Clutter” here →https://bit.ly/470YF3y
Some mornings, I wake up already three steps ahead of myself — thinking, planning, managing. Today I caught that pattern and decided to do something radically simple: I walked.
No playlist. No timer. Just footsteps, breath, and the slow unraveling of my thoughts. By the time I rounded the corner back home, I realized I didn’t need to plan peace. I only needed to make space for it.
What Simplicity Taught Me Today
We spend so much time trying to design perfect beginnings that we forget beginnings only need to start. A single, unpolished action is often what opens the door to momentum.
Simplicity doesn’t shrink us — it centers us. It turns effort into ease, and motion into meaning.
Reflection Prompt
What’s one area of your life that’s waiting for a simple start?
Don’t over-engineer it — just choose the next smallest step you can take today.
It might be a ten-minute walk, clearing one counter, or sitting quietly before you scroll.
Take that step, breathe, and notice how it feels to move without the pressure of perfect.
Keep Walking
Join us as we’ll continue with Day 2 — Clearing Mental Clutter.
Bring your curiosity, a journal if you’d like, and a few quiet minutes to think.
Join the Walk
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New posts released on Wednesdays.
Author’s Note
Written after a sunrise walk, when the air was still cool and the world felt uncomplicated. Sometimes peace just needs permission to arrive.
#ConfidentStrides | #SweetNSocial | Written by Tonia Tyler
Before You Go
Before you go, you’re invited to take the free Kahoot! Self Study, Interactive Reflection Quiz inspired by today’s post.
There’s something about this season of life that keeps whispering the same word to me: simple. Not smaller. Not less. Just simple.
Maybe it’s because I’ve spent years building, creating, and juggling. Somewhere along the way, I realized that even good things can get heavy. Or maybe it’s because walking has become my reminder that peace often hides in the pauses we resist taking.
Whatever the reason, I felt a quiet nudge. I wanted to explore what happens when I stop complicating what’s already working. The goal is to strip things down to their honest rhythm.
Why This Journey
So I’m beginning a seven-day journey I’m calling “Simplicity is Powerful.”
Each day, I’ll share a short reflection. It is a moment from my walk or a thought that surfaced. It is also a truth that asked to be noticed. After this, I’ll offer a gentle prompt for you to try if it speaks to you.
This isn’t a program or a checklist. It’s a walk.
Some days, it might just be to take deep breaths. Others challenge you to release something that no longer fits.
All I ask is that you bring curiosity and kindness to yourself.
A Simple Truth
The more I slow down, the more I see:
Simplicity isn’t about doing less — it’s about doing what matters with more peace.
Are you ready to walk this out with me? Let’s start together this Wednesday with Day 1 — The Power of Simple Starts.
Walking trail in Tacoma, Washington
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Interactive Reflection:
Explore how simplicity shows up in your stride. Take the Kahoot! Quiz below:
A short, mindful experience inspired by the “Simplicity is Powerful” series.
New posts will launch weekly on Wednesdays.
Author’s Notes
Written during my morning walk, between the rustle of leaves and the rhythm of my breath. Each step reminded me that clarity doesn’t come from control — it comes from motion.
#ConfidentStrides | #SweetNSocial | Written by Tonia Tyler
I’ve been blogging on and off since 2014. Looking back, I noticed a pattern. I’d write for a stretch, then pause. I returned in 2017 and 2018. I picked it back up in 2022 and then paused again. For a while I thought of that as inconsistency. But maybe those were simply the seasons when I needed to pause, think, and process life.
So today, I want to officially introduce myself.
My name is Tonia. I’m a retired Army veteran with 20 years of military and leadership experience. I carry those lessons of discipline and resilience into everything I do. Most of my insights come to me while I’m walking. Moving through the world helps me process thoughts. It sparks creativity. It also allows me to see things from new perspectives.
I’m also a former podcast host. For four years I hosted Coffee with T. It was a conversational space where guests and I explored personal growth, business, and life lessons. That experience taught me the power of authentic dialogue. It also highlighted the value of giving others a platform to share their stories.
Community is another heartbeat of mine. I organize meetups that bring people together for networking, encouragement, and growth. Whether online or in person, I believe in the magic of people gathering to support each other.
Of course, life lessons don’t always come from formal roles. Sometimes the greatest insights come from my granddaughter, who reminds me that joy and curiosity are powerful teachers. Other times, they come from everyday adventures. These include house sitting and pet sitting. I’ve learned just as much from wagging tails and quiet purrs as I have from leadership books.
This blog is where I weave all those threads together. It’s a space for reflection. It offers practical wisdom. It explores what it means to live with confidence and stride ahead with purpose.
So if you’re new here, welcome. And if you’ve walked with me before, thank you for staying on the journey.
“The only thing standing between you and your goal is the bullshit story you keep telling yourself as to why you can’t achieve it.” ― Jordan Belfort
Have you ever stopped doing something you enjoyed because you didn’t get likes, subscribers or followers you wanted? I want to talk about how we can manage the external sources of influence that keep us from creating the life we want.
One day while I was running, I was thinking to myself that I would stop making Instagram Reels. The problem with that thinking is, I love making Instagram Reel videos. I love taking 10-second clips of video and turning it into a snippet of entertainment. I think that is why I have enjoyed learning how to make YouTube videos too.
Back to the problem, I was getting frustrated because I was losing followers on my IG page and I automatically assume it was because of the videos. I also started criticizing myself for posting videos of the nature I would see on my walks which helps me to stay creative.
I was ready to stop doing the one of the things that brings me joy because of external sources. In many cases we don’t know or will never know why people unfollow, unsubscribe, or unlike us, but our minds will search for reasons and that what was happening to me.
Here’s what we have to keep in mind, their action have nothing to do with us. We are internalizing or trying to rationalize what someone else is thinking when we try to “guess” or “figure out” what made them take action without ever asking them directly. When we do this, nothing positive usually comes from this kind of thinking. We are our worst critiques!
When we decide to stop doing the things we enjoy doing because of likes, subscribers, or followers we are measuring our success by the standards of others. These are what we call external sources of influences. Learning how to navigate these external sources of influences is key especially when it comes to honoring what it is that we enjoy doing and makes us happy.
Here are a few suggestions that have helped me:
Define what success looks like to you.
Asking yourself what feeling are you after is a great place to start. Are you after happiness? Inner peace? Fulfillment? Then ask yourself, what kinds of activities bring me those kinds of feelings?
When I started walking years ago, I was looking for inner peace during a chaotic period of my life. Nine years later, I still walk because I found the inner peace I was looking for in my life. I also lost weight and my marriage is much healthier and stronger too.
Keep in mind why you started in the first place.
Sometimes when we stop to reconnect with our why, we remember what was the motivating force behind starting in the first place.
For instance, when I started my YouTube channel, I started it as a way to provide uplifting content to deal with the COVID shutdown. I asked some of the life coaches in my network if they would like to share some insight on how to deal with the COVID shutdown. My goal was not to become a YouTube Influencer.
By always remembering why I started my channel it helps me to keep in perspective what I am doing it for so when I don’t get the likes, subscribers or comments I don’t have the desire to quit. I have stronger reason to keep going and that is like sprinkles on the cupcake. It also helps me to stay consistent in uploading my content. Whoever is looking for it, when they need it, can find it!
Remember that You Matter.
I think this one is the most important factor in all of this. You matter and your voice matters. Our experiences in life are not exclusively for you. It is for you to share the lessons you learned because of it.
When we take time to learn the lessons along our journey, they can become the missing pieces to someone else’s puzzle. When we allow the external sources of influence to stop us, we are saying subconsciously, that we do not matter and what we experience in life is irrelevant. That is one of the biggest lies we can say to ourselves. You matter, your opinions matter and someone is waiting for your message in the big beautiful world of ours.
Thank you for taking time out to read this post. I invite you to check out my Instagram Reels and leave a comment. Feedback is always welcome.
“Know the rules well, so you can break them effectively.” ― Dalai Lama XIV
Quora Question: How did you force yourself to stick to healthy habits?
The very first thing I did was determine what I wanted to create and then I set up rules that would protect my habit until it could “feed” itself.
For instance, when I started my walking habit, my main objective was to find peace during a chaotic period of my life. I had always enjoyed playing and being out in nature while I was growing up. I found peace and happiness so when I needed to find peace, I went back to the one thing I knew would give me that. A walk in the park. I never set out to become a “walker” it just felt right and natural. Nine years later, I still find peace and happiness out on the trails.
I would never encourage anyone to “force” themselves to do anything. I think the biggest success comes from knowing your why first and trusting the process as it unfolds. You can still set up “rules” like I will do two sit-ups during a commercial break, or I will drink water first thing in the morning, but these are ways to help you stay in alignment with your WHY.
Another influence that helps you stay on course is taking each day one step at a time. Start small and let the motivation of each win carry you forward. A few months into my walking journey, I started paying attention to the kinds of food I was eating. After a great walk, I didn’t want to ruin it by eating a burger and fries. I slowly added salads to my diet.
No one likes to be pushed around so why would you want to do that to yourself?
As humans, we are designed with “three chairmen”, the mind, body, and spirit connection. When they are in sync, you become unstoppable by simply deciding. Get clear about your WHY and opportunities to help you achieve your goal will pop up on your mental radar.
Here are some things to consider when implementing “rules”
If you know the rules, then you know how to break them too especially if we are the ones who made them in the first place. Rules serve a very important role when first establishing a new habit, but if they remain checked, they can also become the very thing that hinders your growth.
Consider rules like a baby’s crib, they serve to protect your habit but eventually we will outgrow them. It isn’t until you want to create or break a habit that you realize just how much our rules have an influence on our behavior.
Realize that with everything that is worthwhile in having, it needs time and space to cultivate. By adding this new habit, consider what you need to prepare for it to grow. For example, readers look for time to read even perhaps create a special corner or buy a special reading chair to ease their mind for reading mode.
What will help trigger your habit? Like I mentioned above, commercial breaks can be your trigger to do push-ups or sit-ups. This reminds me of the time when I was in the military, and we were preparing for an upcoming fitness test. Our commanders would post signs like “do 20 push-ups” on Post-It-Notes on their doors. If you entered their office, you had to do what was posted on the note. It made it kind of fun especially when the whole company was involved.
Keep it fun. Creating habits does not have to be forced. Get your family or friends involved to help you stay on track. Celebrate the wins and keep track of your progress. Seeing progress is another great way to keep you going.
Last and certainly not least, give yourself grace. The fact that you made the decision to change is the most important decision of all. Remember, if it was easy, everyone would do it!
Thank you for taking time out to read this post. I would love to learn more about who you are and what you do. Feel free to check out my YouTube Channels and leave a comment.
“Give space to your thoughts, clear the noise in your head, chit-chat with your inner critic, decide and move on.” ― Cristina Imre
I woke up thinking about how I almost let my inner critic stop me from growing this week. Here’s my challenge.
I love making Instagram Reels. It’s easy and fun for me to put little video clips together. What I figured out is that I could create the video clips and then add them to my YouTube channel as Shorts. It is a win-win for me and my viewers because I found another way to keep my original channel active now that I have moved my interview content to a whole new channel. This is also an opportunity to share more about who I am and what I do.
There is only one thing that presents a struggle and that is my fear of talking directly into the camera. In order to overcome this resistance, I decided to talk about the one thing I feel pretty confident about and that is habits. I started recording mini videos of my talking about how to make habits stick as I work on my challenge of talking on video.
I had one fluke video hit over 1600 views and I was feeling pretty good. The next couple of videos hit about 100 views and lately my videos are only attracting 3-6 views. I started obsessing about the view count and was ready to stop making videos. I started looking at the view count as my success indicator.
My inner critic was in full attack mode and had enough ammunition to make me want to give up. I started questioning myself and this whole idea of creating YouTube Shorts. I started thinking I wasn’t doing the “right” thing. Fortunately, I woke up this morning with a refreshed attitude and a the insight of, “stop looking at the numbers.”
After a few minutes of reflection, I realized “stop looking at the numbers” was code for stop looking for outside validation.
How many times have you stopped doing what you enjoy doing because the numbers don’t look good, especially in the beginning? Did we start out doing it for the numbers? For me the answer is no. I wanted to share information on a subject that I love talking about and I thought could be of help to someone else. I also wanted to get pass my fear of speaking directly on camera.
It is at these moments in time that the one person who pops in my head (surprisingly) is Cardi B. She went from being a stripper to becoming a rapper. I can only imagine how much negativity and limited self-talk she had to overcome. So when I think about giving up, I think about how other people had to overcome the same “stinking thinking” in order to do what they are doing today. If Cardi B can go from stripping to becoming a sought out entertainer, I can get past my fear of talking on camera!
Who inspires you and why? Keep them in mind when your inner critic starts to creep in. There are so many people, who battle their inner critic everyday and are winning, and so can we!
Here’s some additional suggestions I would like to offer up:
Write out your “why” and keep it in view.
Make a list of people who inspire you along with why they inspire you.
Before making any major decisions, go for a walk or allow some time for you to think. Let you mind settle.
Journal your thoughts and feelings. Awareness is key!
Record your progress. Every little step forward is a win.
Celebrate your wins.
Find an accountability partner.
Keep in mind that everyone has to start somewhere. It is always harder in the beginning.
Don’t pay attention to the numbers! If the vision or the thought came to you, it belongs to you. You are the one who can bring it to life, if you choose to.
Thank you for taking time out to read this post. I would love to learn more about who you are and what you do. Feel free to check out my YouTube Channels and leave a comment.
“If you are not consciously building your habits, they are unconsciously building you.” ― Anika J. Green
Quora Question: What is one way to create good habits that stick?
I would like to begin by answering this question by saying, take an assessment of what you are doing right now. Pay attention to the types of activities you do right now because without knowing where you are, you won’t be able to know if you are heading in the right direction once you start.
There is a little tiny “GPS” in all of us that knows what we need and what we want, but for some reason, we turned the volume off or never even tried to turn it on in the first place.
My first bit of advice is to get still and listen for that small, tiny voice or start paying attention to what makes your heart sing. These are clues that your soul is sending to us, and we must start listening otherwise the activities we try to incorporate into our lives will not stick.
Depending where you are on your personal development journey, there are things we can implement that can help us become better listeners. I would like to offer a few suggestions here:
Go for a daily walk. You can start off with a 5 or 10-minute walk around your neighborhood or at a local park. The point of starting is to make it simple and doable.
Start a gratitude journal. When you write, you are making your thoughts visible. You can’t write something without first thinking about it. Again, start small with maybe 3-5 things you are grateful for each day or once a week.
Meditate. Shut your devices off and sit quietly for 5-10 minutes.
These activities are great for helping to turn your personal, inner GPS system back on or helping you to adjust the volume back up.
What I have learned through my own personal journey is that what we do is influenced by what we believe is possible for ourselves. This is where the inner “GPS” practices I mentioned above can come in handy. By honestly assessing where we are mentally, emotionally, and physically, we can then determine what is working for us and what we need to change.
Here are some great questions to ask yourself that can help in your assessment:
Who am I and who do I want to become?
What do I believe about myself and is it true?
What kind of activity will help me to become this kind of person?
What kind of person do I want to be know for?
The bottom line is this… we are creatures of habits! We create all kinds of habits all of the time just by doing things, sometimes on purpose, and sometimes by accident. Habits become what we do without even having to think it. It takes a lot of energy to think and that is why our brains looks for ways to save energy. So, to create positive habits that stick, you must become intentional. That means we must get our brains to wake up and think again about what we are doing. Bad habits can be formed just as easily as good habits. The difference is the kind of person you want to be identified as because of that activity. Runners run. Readers read. Creators create.
Who do you want to be?
Thinking is the magic ingredient that helps habits stick. The key to implementing the kind of change to create the desired habits is to be intentional and make our activities small, simple, and doable until they become automatic.
Thank you for taking time out to read this post. I would love to learn more about who you are and what you do. Feel free to connect with me through a Meetup group.
Sweet N Social 