Tag: letting go

  • Embracing Presence: Lessons from the Shore

    Embracing Presence: Lessons from the Shore

    The waves at Fort Ord have a rhythm all their own. Some crash loud and proud, spraying salt mist high into the air. Others roll in quietly, curling under themselves before disappearing back into the sea.

    I’m sitting on the sand with my phone in hand. I am waiting for that perfect shot. It’s the kind that makes you feel the power and pull of the ocean even through a screen. Every time I look away, it occurs. The big wave comes. It’s the perfect one. It’s the moment I thought I was ready for.

    It makes me laugh a little. There’s something poetic about missing the moment because I was too busy trying to catch it.


    The Illusion of Control

    As a photographer, I’ve learned that timing is everything. But here, sitting by the water, I realize that control is an illusion.

    You can prepare your camera, adjust your focus, line up your frame — but the waves don’t act on command. They come when they come. The ocean has no interest in your readiness or your plans.

    And as an entrepreneur, that lesson hits home.
    How many times have I tried to line up everything just right before launching something new? Waiting for the “perfect” moment — the right lighting, the right energy, the right audience? And still, somehow, the timing never feels exact.

    Because life, like the ocean, has its own rhythm.


    Presence Over Perfection

    I put my phone down and just watch for a while. Without the pressure to capture, I start to see. I watch the shimmer of sunlight on the water. I notice the way each wave builds quietly before bursting open. I appreciate the stillness between them.

    There’s beauty in those in-between moments too, the pauses between the noise.

    Sometimes the best thing you can do is simply sit and watch.
    You’ll never catch the perfect shot, and maybe that’s the point.

    It’s not about catching the moment — it’s about being there for it.


    The Entrepreneur’s Ocean

    Entrepreneurship can feel a lot like watching waves. One moment, everything’s calm — steady clients, steady flow, steady confidence. The next, the tide shifts. A new idea rushes in, or a plan you counted on crashes before it lands.

    And still, we show up.
    We adjust, breathe, and wait for the next wave.

    The ocean teaches something that no business book can:
    You can’t force momentum. You can only prepare your stance and trust your footing.

    When the wave comes, you ride it.
    When it doesn’t, you rest and watch.


    The Gift of Surrender

    There’s a strange peace that comes with letting go of control.
    Once I stop trying to expect the next wave, I notice how everything slows down. My breath slows, my mind calms, and even my heartbeat eases.

    It reminds me that presence isn’t passive. It’s an active choice to be here, now — not somewhere in the “what if.”

    The ocean doesn’t apologize for its unpredictability. It simply is.
    And maybe that’s what balance looks like. It’s about learning to move in rhythm with what’s unfolding. This is instead of fighting against it.


    A Lesson in Timing

    The afternoon sun glistens on the water. I look out and catch it just in time. A perfect, towering wave curls into gold. It’s magnificent, and this time, I don’t reach for my phone. I just watch.

    The foam curls, the light dances, and the moment passes — but not really.
    It’s still with me, imprinted deeper than any photo could have captured.

    The peace isn’t in freezing the moment.
    It’s in feeling it.


    The Takeaway

    Maybe we spend too much time trying to catch life instead of living it.
    Trying to control timing instead of trusting it. I also learned a lesson doesn’t end here — the ocean always finds another way to speak.

    The waves will keep coming, whether I’m ready or not. And maybe that’s the beauty of it. It’s knowing that everything meant for me will arrive when I’m here enough to get it.

    The waves come when they come.
    The peace is in being there when they do.


    Reflection Prompt

    Where in your life are you trying to control the timing instead of simply being present for the flow?


    Author’s Note

    This piece was one of three reflections that arrived on the same afternoon at Fort Ord State Beach. Each carried its own message. Yet, this one asked me to slow down. It encouraged me to look up from the screen. I needed to witness life as it was. I shouldn’t try to capture or control it.


    • If this reflection resonated with you, follow Sweet N Social. You will find more stories about presence, growth, and everyday lessons in motion.
    • Want the mini-conversation behind this reflection? Listen here
    • Join the Confident Strides community on Mighty Networks. Share what the waves are teaching you in your own life:  https://bit.ly/4i1fhx2

    By Tonia Tyler | #ConfidentStrides | Sweet N Social

    #ConfidentStrides #GrowthInMotion #SweetNSocial #EntrepreneurMindset #LetItFlow #SimplicityIsPowerful


  • Confident Strides: The Podcast — Episode 1: Embracing Presence: Lessons from the Shore

    Confident Strides: The Podcast — Episode 1: Embracing Presence: Lessons from the Shore

    Episode Summary

    Confident Strides: The Podcast invites listeners to think about the value of attendance over perfection. This episode shares a personal story at Fort Ord State Beach. It explores how focusing on capturing moments can distract us. This distraction can prevent us from truly experiencing them. It highlights the importance of letting go, being existing, and finding confidence in the unpredictability of life’s waves.


    Show Notes

    In this episode, we walk through:

    • A full-circle moment years in the making
    • The tension between capturing a moment and living it
    • What the ocean teaches about timing, release, and acceptance
    • How presence builds confidence in unexpected ways
    • Why perfectionism often robs us of the very peace we’re seeking

    Key themes:

    • Presence over perfection
    • Letting go of control
    • Mindful movement
    • Personal growth in motion
    • Nature as a teacher

    Favorite Moment

    “The waves come when they come. The peace is in being there when they do.”


    Transcript

    Tonia Tyler (00:00)
    Welcome to Confidence Tries, the podcast. Quiet moments, powerful insights, a space to walk, reflect, and grow.

    Speaker (00:10)
    So picture this. I’m standing on this wide, quiet beach, phone in hand, just totally determined to snap the perfect wave. But every single time, I thought, this is it. The moment slipped right past me. I couldn’t help but laugh at myself after the third missed shot. That’s happened to me too, and it’s so frustrating. There’s that urge to capture something amazing. But while you’re busy fiddling with your phone,

    the thing you wanted to catch is already gone. It’s like you’re so focused on preserving the perfect memory, you end up missing out on actually experiencing it. Exactly. And then it hit me, how many of those moments have I let pass by? Just because I was too wrapped up in trying to control them, life’s got this wild way of rolling on, like those waves, whether we’re ready or not. What surprised me most is how much calmer things feel when you just let go of trying to capture it all. I mean,

    You stop chasing the perfect timing and just soak up what’s right in front of you, even if it’s messy or unpredictable. Totally. When I finally lowered my phone and just watched, it was this totally different experience. There was this one wave, tall and golden in the late sun. And for once I just took it in. No photo, no proof, just memory. Moments like that stick with you, don’t they? It almost feels freeing, not needing to hold on to everything or get every detail right.

    You get this sense of peace from just being present, even if you’re not capturing it for later. Yeah, and it makes me wonder how often we mistake control for confidence, if I can just get the shot or plan the outcome, then maybe everything will feel secure. But really, it’s the letting go where the real confidence is. Funny you say that, because every time I’ve tried to force things to go my way, it never quite works out. But when I just show up and let things unfold,

    That’s when I actually feel grounded. It’s a totally different kind of trust. One that’s about being present, not perfect. That actually reminds me how important it is to walk at your own pace. The ocean’s not rushing for anyone, and neither should we. There’s this quiet strength in just moving forward. Even if it doesn’t look picture perfect. Absolutely, and I think sometimes we need those reminders. You can’t control the waves, but you can choose to be there, fully.

    for whatever comes. That’s how real confidence grows step by step, right where you are.

    Tonia Tyler (02:41)
    Your path, your pace, your confidence.


    Reflection Prompt

    Where in your life are you trying so hard to capture the perfect moment that you’re missing the one right in front of you?


    By Tonia Tyler | #ConfidentStrides | Sweet N Social

  • How to Discover Life-Changing Power Through 7 Simple Daily Reflection Exercises – Week 2

    How to Discover Life-Changing Power Through 7 Simple Daily Reflection Exercises – Week 2

    (Week 2 — Clearing Mental Clutter)

    Cabo San Lucas

    A Still Moment

    During today’s walk, my mind was louder than the world around me.

    Lists. Plans. What-ifs. All of it looping like static.

    Then a breeze brushed across my face, and in that instant, everything paused.

    I couldn’t feel the wind and worry at the same time.

    That tiny interruption reminded me that peace doesn’t always need perfect circumstances—just a little space to notice the now.


    What Simplicity Taught Me Today

    Mental clutter doesn’t disappear because we “think harder.”

    It softens when we stop long enough to see what truly needs our attention.

    Sometimes, the act of stopping and processing reveals that what we thought was urgent… isn’t.

    And what truly matters has been waiting quietly beneath the noise.

    Clearing space isn’t only about silencing thoughts. It’s about sorting them. It’s about seeing what belongs. It’s also about letting the rest drift away.

    Sometimes that means stepping outside, closing your eyes, and letting the air do its quiet work.


    Reflection Prompt

    Where does your mind feel most crowded right now—your schedule, your emotions, or your to-do list?

    Pause and ask yourself: What really needs my attention right now?

    Write it down or speak it out loud, and let the wind have the rest.


    Keep Walking

    Next, we’ll explore how outer order supports inner calm in Day 3 — Declutter Your Space, Calm Your Mind.


    Join the Walk

    If this reflection resonates, subscribe to Sweet N Social to get the next post in your inbox.

    Share your moment of stillness with #ConfidentStrides #SweetNSocial 


    Author’s Note

    Written after a breezy morning walk. Silence spoke louder than thought. Clarity came from realizing what actually mattered.

    #ConfidentStrides | #SweetNSocial | Written by Tonia Tyler


    Before You Go

    You’re invited to take the free Kahoot! Self Study, Interactive Reflection Quiz inspired by today’s post.

    Take the free Clearing Mental Clutter Quiz Here: https://bit.ly/47tP1XB

  • Period of Transition

     

    42023921 - monarch on a sunflower

    “Only those who stick around long enough to see the caterpillar turn into the butterfly actually get to witness the transformation.” ― Kristin Michelle Elizabeth

    I love this quote because it reminds me that there will be people in and out of your lives constantly.  I have been guilty of is worrying about those who didn’t stick around.  Let it go! The past is just that, the past.  Maybe, just maybe, their assignment was up and it was time for them, or you, to move on. Look for the blessing or the lesson and keep moving forward.

    Worry about who isn’t in your life anymore, keeps us from appreciating those who are.  This is nothing but a “period of transition”. For those who did not stay around to witness your transformation, wish them good will and release any negativity that may have surrounded their departure.  Holding on to the negativity is like holding onto an anchor, it just holds you back. Everyone, including you are on our own journeys.  All we can ever do is just keep crawling until it’s time to grow your wings and fly!

    Photo Source: click here    / Quote Source: click here.

  • Holding On

    Holding On

    dreamstime_s_53141518I have an elderly neighbor who holds onto everything.  She gives me things that are more than thirty years old sometimes. I appreciate the gifts but I wonder why is she holding on to the stuff or better yet what does she plan to do with it once she passes. It may sound like a morbid thought but it always brings me back to the decisions I make for me and my family.  I want to leave my family with more than just debt!  I realize it is the memories that last.  We are all passing through this time and space, if we chose to let go of things, we could begin to hold on to love.

    Photo credit: http://www.ilanelanzen.com/personaldevelopment/the-many-meanings-of-holding-hands/

  • With The Flow

    With The Flow

    fast-riverI believe. I trust. I let go. Those three statements are written on a Post-It note that I have taped up in my wardrobe closet so I can see them everyday I as I get dressed.

     I believe that we have to set clear intentions of what we would like. What does success look like to you? Live life on your idea of what success means for you.

     I trust that the Universe will provide us not only with what we want but what we need to grow and flourish in life.

     And lastly, I let go of how I think everything “should” go. Set your goals, but stay open to the possibilities that life is offering up. Let life flow.

    Photo credit: click here.

  • Defend Less, Learn More

    Defend Less, Learn More

    305530fYour greatest gift is your adaptability. When you can learn to let go of your need to control, life opens up and flows. I am still a work in progress, but I am not so hell bent on having things go “my way”. Life has become more enjoyable and my relationships have significantly improved. I no longer feel as if I have to defend my opinions but rather expand my sense of understanding. Each and every one of us were created with a purpose that this world so desperately needs. As Zig Ziglar so eloquently stated: Man was designed for accomplishment, engineered for success, and endowed with the seeds of greatness. Know that you are not diminished by anyone else’s opinion.

    Photo credit: click here.

  • Excess Baggage

    Excess Baggage

    excess-baggageAt some point in time, we all have to take inventory of the baggage we have picked up and have been carrying throughout this journey called life. I found if we learn to identify ours and put down the ones that belong to others, the journey gets easier. I encourage you to sort through the bags you’ve been carrying, find your baggage and let others carry their own.

    Photo credit: click here.

  • Loosen Your Grip

    Loosen Your Grip

    careers_ladderMastering the art of letting go is being able to let go of what no longer is serving a purpose. By letting go you make from for new things to come along in order for your growth. You can not climb without letting go of your current ladder rung.

    Photo credit: click here.