Sweet N Social

Tag: life advice

  • Does a Penny Still Have Value? Yes. So Pick them up off the Ground

    Does a Penny Still Have Value? Yes. So Pick them up off the Ground


    “Be less curious about people and more curious about ideas.” ― Marie Curie

    Quora Question: When you see a coin on the ground, do you pick it up or leave it there?

    While I was on my morning run this morning, I saw a penny laying on the ground and I initially ran over it without picking it up. I usually pick up pennies and I don’t worry about if it is face up or not. I don’t believe in the superstition about heads or tails.  I had a nagging feeling to turn around and pick it up and that is what I did.

    I didn’t always stop to pick up pennies until I relieved it’s a form of currency no matter what.  I have heard some people say that the penny is worthless.  I don’t believe that’s necessarily true. There are 100 pennies in one dollar and 100,000 pennies in 1,000 dollars.  The key is to remember that each penny adds up to something. It always comes down to your perception of what equates to value.

    Here is another way to look at this…

    Over the past few years, I have come to believe that each one of us has a message, a gift, or an experience to share with the world.  Our ideas are the sparks that lead us on the path of discovery.  If you believe you have nothing to offer, you have no desire to explore what’s hidden deep down inside of you.  If you do believe you have something of value to offer, we put in effort to discover what it is.  We look for ways to share that message or story once we find it.  Some of create businesses.  Some of us write books or publish blogs. Some of us hop on podcasts or other social media channels because we want our messages and ideas out there in the world. 

    So where am I going with this… 

    Our ideas are the pennies that add value to the collective whole. Think about YouTube, if there was only one channel on the whole platform, it wouldn’t be one of the most searched platforms for entertainment or educational tools. It wouldn’t be considered “YouTube University” for sure!  YouTube doesn’t add content, it manages the content that we provide and makes a nice profit from it.  The ideas of the individuals who upload to the platform is what makes YouTube valuable!  In other words, there are more than 100,000,000,000 ideas (pennies) that help pull in the 1.8 billion subscribers of YouTube.  

    Every penny has a value, just as every person matters and we all add to the collective whole.  When we can see the value in each of our experiences, we will stop leaving the pennies on the ground, and or ideas un-explored.  Each of our experiences in life provide ideas and lessons that the world can use.  These ideas and beliefs help shape who you are and when we stop, collect them, and add them up, we may just realize how valuable we are because of them.

    Quote Source: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag?utf8=✓&id=ideas

    Thank you for taking time out to read this post. I would love to learn more about who you are and what you do. Feel free to connect with me through a Meetup group.

    1. Confident Strides Women’s Empowerment Network https://bit.ly/CSWENMeetup
    2. Confident Strides Personal Development Network Group https://bit.ly/CSPDNMeetup
    3. Confident Strides Women’s Professional Network https://bit.ly/CSWPNMeetup
    4. Confident Strides Entrepreneurs Network https://bit.ly/CSENMeetup

    To connect with me: https:///confidentstrides

  • No Mental Energy Required: How to Know If We Have Developed a Desired Habit

    No Mental Energy Required: How to Know If We Have Developed a Desired Habit

    “Change might not be fast and it isn’t always easy. But with time and effort, almost any habit can be reshaped.” ― Charles Duhigg

    Quora Question: When can we say that we have already developed a good reading habit?

    I think a habit takes hold when you no longer must put mental effort into doing it. 

    A habit starts off hard because we must put extra mental effort into planning and executing it. It’s like when we first learned how to drive a car.  We got in and ran through a mental checklist of everything we needed to do to get started.  Do we have to adjust our seat or mirrors?  Do I have my seatbelt on?  Once everything was ready, then we could drive off.

    It’s the same mental energy we must use to establish a new habit whether it’s reading, exercise or eating healthy.

    In establishing a reading habit, our mental effort goes into choosing a book, what time of day is best for reading your book, as well as staying focused in reading the book once you have sat down. 

    As driving a car has become a “non-thinking” habit, reading, exercise and eating healthy also becomes a “non-thinking” habit.  We just do it.  When you can name off your favorite author or favorite books or grab a book anytime you have free time, that’s when you realize you have developed a reading habit.

    Another indication of a developed habit is when you “crave” that activity.  There are sometimes when I turn on the television, surf the channels and nothing catches my attention.  I find myself turning of the television and grabbing a book instead.  Sometimes a can read a book for more than an hour and never realize how much time has passed.

    I think the biggest thing to keep in mind about developing habits is your “why” behind it.  Awareness is key! Some habits take hold easier because of your passion in achieving a specific goal.  My reading habit developed when I wanted to learn how to change some of my undesirable behaviors.  The desire to change, was the first step in changing.  Along my change journey, I developed not only a reading habit but also an exercise habit and a journaling habit.

    So here are some takeaways I would like to share:

    1. Your “why” will help with the “how”.  It’s like putting your brain on notice to start looking for ways to help you achieve a desired outcome.
    2. Keep in mind, change is never easy.  If it was, everyone would do it. 
    3. There is no hack in developing a habit. It takes mental effort and desired outcome to keep you motivated.
    4. Track your progress. Celebrate the little wins along the way.
    5. Give yourself Grace. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither is a habit!

    Thank you for taking time out to read this post. I would love to learn more about who you are and what you do. Feel free to connect with me through a Meetup group.

    1. Confident Strides Women’s Empowerment Network https://bit.ly/CSWENMeetup
    2. Confident Strides Personal Development Network Group https://bit.ly/CSPDNMeetup
    3. Confident Strides Women’s Professional Network https://bit.ly/CSWPNMeetup
    4. Confident Strides Entrepreneurs Network https://bit.ly/CSENMeetup

    Quote Source: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/habits

    To connect with me: https:///confidentstrides

  • Abandon Doing What Comes Easy and Devote Your Time to The Life you Want

    Abandon Doing What Comes Easy and Devote Your Time to The Life you Want

    “Your days are numbered. Use them to throw open the windows of your soul to the sun. If you do not, the sun will soon set, and you with it.” ― Marcus Aurelius

    Quora Question: What do you do to pass the time other than social media (Reddit included), TV or reading a book?

    My favorite “go-to” activity is always a walk in the park. I love getting out and connecting with nature. But like anything in life, I have times when I just don’t feel like walking. So, I would ask myself, “what else can I do that I can do for free?”

    Here are some things that happened when I stopped watching TV, reduced my time on social media and applied action from the information I learned from the books I read. 

    I discovered Zentangle drawing on a networking call one day which is like a form of meditation. I started learning a foreign language last year. I learned how to use the editing software that came free on my computer and created my own podcast and used the video to create a YouTube channel. I made time to play and learn from my granddaughter on days I don’t have to work. I dedicate quiet time for self-reflection and journaling which has been life changing. I started and organized Meetup groups and connect with people in such places as India and Africa and I write for two blogs.

    One of my favorite quotes I read that made such a huge impact was “Create before you Consume.” -Marie Forleo. 

    Time is always “passing by” but it is what you choose to do with your time and the kind of life you want to live that determines the quality of life you will have. Watching TV and surfing the internet are easy things to do, dig deeper and find out what you can create!

    Thank you for taking time out to read this post. I would love to learn more about who you are and what you do. Feel free to connect with me through a Meetup group.

    1. Confident Strides Women’s Empowerment Network https://bit.ly/CSWENMeetup
    2. Confident Strides Personal Development Network Group https://bit.ly/CSPDNMeetup
    3. Confident Strides Women’s Professional Network https://bit.ly/CSWPNMeetup
    4. Confident Strides Entrepreneurs Network https://bit.ly/CSENMeetup

    Quote Source: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/goals-in-life

    To connect with me: https:///confidentstrides

  • Start From Where You Are: Advice on How to Know if Your Actually Improving

    Start From Where You Are: Advice on How to Know if Your Actually Improving

    “Great goals make great people. People cannot hit what they do not aim for.” ― Roy T. Bennett

    How do I know if I’m actually improving (in everything) – Quora

    When I was in the military, we had to learn map reading and land navigation.  The first think they taught us was how to plot points on the map.  By learning how to plot points on the map, it taught us how to determine where we were on the map.  If you don’t know where you are on the map, you can’t determine where you are heading.  

    The second important lesson we learned about reading maps is recognizing elevation and terrain familiarization. This comes in handy if you get off track.  By recognizing a hill or a valley on the map by the elevation drawings you can follow the terrain to get back on track.

    I share this because the same fundamentals we learn in map reading and land navigation are the same fundamentals we can apply to improving ourselves.  You must know where you are and determine where you want to go.  Theses can become benchmarks on your map of life. Once your plot your points, the next step is to get going.

    Here’s an example, I used to get mad if someone cut me off when I was driving. It was so bad one day when I was taking my son to school, I had just cussed a driver out and I realized I wasn’t being such a super role model for my son who was sitting in the passenger seat watching me.  I was so embarrassed.  I vowed that day; I would change.  I didn’t know how; I just knew why. That was my first plot point on the map. 

    Over the next few months, I read and took up meditation. I learned other ways to channel my emotions.  How I measured my progress was by paying attention to see how I would react to being cut off while driving.  I was beginning to recognize the terrain that had triggered my outrage. 

    When you want to change a behavior, first figure out where you are in the process. Where are you on your life map? What triggers your behavior? Why do you want to change?  Who are you changing for?  These are your plot points on your life map.  Then determine what kind of person you want to become? What books can help you? Who can you talk to? There are more plot points that will help you on your path.

    When you no longer react but rather respond to situations that once triggered a reaction, you know you are making progress.  The landscape/ terrain starts to change within you.  

    I also would love to learn more about who you are and what you do. Feel free to connect with me through a Meetup group.

    1. Confident Strides Women’s Empowerment Network https://bit.ly/CSWENMeetup
    2. Confident Strides Personal Development Network Group https://bit.ly/CSPDNMeetup
    3. Confident Strides Women’s Professional Network https://bit.ly/CSWPNMeetup

    Quote Source: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/goals

    To connect with me: https:///confidentstrides

  • Examine Your Motives First: How to Develop a Positive Attitude

    Examine Your Motives First: How to Develop a Positive Attitude

    “It isn’t what you have or who you are or where you are or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy. It is what you think about it.” ― Dale Carnegie

    I love choosing questions from Quora to answer. I chose this question about how to develop a positive attitude towards reading, but you can apply this principle to just about any thing we do, so feel free to check out my answer below.

    How can I develop a positive attitude towards reading?-Quora

    I did not invest in reading books until I reached my forties. I never had a real desire to pick up a book until I was going through a difficult period in my life.  I wanted answers and so I turned to books for answers, answers that my friends could not help me with.  

    I think when you take time out to examine why you do anything is the key to determining how you feel about doing it in the first place. So many times, we just jump in and start doing things without examining the “why” behind it.  

    • Are you doing it because it is popular?
    • Are you doing it to fit in?
    • Are you doing it because someone else told you that you should?
    • Are you doing it because you want to learn something, and you feel drawn to do it?

    The intention behind the activity will help you either stay motivated to continue or eventually cause you to fizzle out.

    Here are some suggestions I would like to offer:

    1. Before diving into anything, take a moment to think about why you are about do it in the first place.  Be honest with yourself and if you need to, write it out. What do you hope to gain?
    2. If it is something you must put money into it, place a cushion between the thought and the action. That helps to reduce impulsive actions. 
    3. Regarding reading, you can look for free resources before committing to any kind of subscription or purchasing books that you might not even want to read after you buy them.  This reduces the emotional energy and guilt that comes with buyer’s remorse. 
    4. Connect with other readers and create or join a book club. It’s always more fun when others get involved.  
    5. Don’t feel like you must stick with one genre.  Lessons can be found anywhere when you are looking for them.

    Whether you are looking to create a reading habit, workout regiment, or jump into a new career, take a moment to examine your intentions behind the action.  By taking a moment to understand the driving force behind our desires, we are also preparing ourselves for the obstacles and the resistance that will inevitably come with that change. 

    In all that you do, the key to achieving your desired goal is your mental attitude towards obtaining that goal. With a positive mental attitude, you will become unstoppable!

    I also would love to learn more about who you are and what you do. Feel free to connect with me through a Meetup group.

    1. Confident Strides Women’s Empowerment Network https://bit.ly/CSWENMeetup
    2. Confident Strides Personal Development Network Group https://bit.ly/CSPDNMeetup
    3. Confident Strides Women’s Professional Network https://bit.ly/CSWPNMeetup

    Quote Source: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/attitude

    To connect with me: https:///confidentstrides

  • Appreciate Yours Strengths: Advice on How to Have More Self-Discipline

    Appreciate Yours Strengths: Advice on How to Have More Self-Discipline

    “No person is free who is not master of himself.” ― Epictetus

    I was going to pass on answering the following Quora question because it was geared toward school but the more I thought about this question I realized, this is not only relevant for people in school but you can also have the same challenge at work. So I decided to post an answer and I am sharing it here with you.

    How can I have more self-discipline? I never do homework and I’m not doing well in school because I’m lazy and have no self-discipline. – Quora

    The first thing I would change is the label you identify yourself with. You are not lazy; you are just not enthusiastic about learning. It could be that you are bored, and you need other ways to stimulate your brain.

    For instance, I don’t like learning about money or finances, but I love learning about how our brains work. 

    When you find something that gets you excited in learning new things, look for ways that you can apply that enthusiasm towards the challenging subjects. If you enjoy gaming, use it to reward yourself for doing something you don’t like. For example, if you study for an upcoming test, after the test reward yourself with extra gaming time. 

    We all have something that is challenging for ourselves, the key is to not beat yourself up. Find what you are good at and use it as a catalyst to help you through the challenges.

    As I mentioned in the beginning, I have always struggled with managing my finances, but I am great at management my time. I had to learn how to use the same disciple principles I learn in managing my time and apply it towards managing my finances. It’s harder but the concept is the same. I just had to learn to make the connection.

    Here are some other suggestions you can consider:

    • Everyone must overcome something to achieve their goals, read a few biographies and see how others overcame their challenges. Let their stories inspire you.
    • Change the way you talk about yourself and to yourself. Your words and thoughts carry great power. 
    • Partner with others who help you become better. Join a study group or create one. 
    • Set a goal for yourself. If you have something to aim for, you know when you are off track and can adjust when you are heading in the wrong direction. 

    The most important takeaway I would like to close out with is the give yourself some grace. Be patient and loving with who you are. You just haven’t found what gets you excited yet and that’s okay.

    I also would love to learn more about who you are and what you do. Feel free to connect with me through a Meetup group.

    1. Confident Strides Women’s Empowerment Network https://bit.ly/CSWENMeetup
    2. Confident Strides Personal Development Network Group https://bit.ly/CSPDNMeetup
    3. Confident Strides Women’s Professional Network https://bit.ly/CSWPNMeetup

    Quote Source: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/self-discipline

    To connect with me: https:///confidentstrides

  • Focus on You – Ways on How to Be Better Person

    Focus on You – Ways on How to Be Better Person

    “It is less about becoming a better person, and more of being better, as a person.” ― J.R. Rim

    How can I be better for myself and my partner? – Quora

    My relationships got better when I stopped trying to change my partner and focused on changing myself.  My husband and I have been married now for fifteen years.  I had been married twice before.  This marriage was heading towards divorce too until I got an epiphany on a walk one day where I asked myself, “what has all of these marriages have in common?”  The answer was ME!

    I went from relationship to relationship never taking time out to figure out who I was. I was carrying baggage from one relationship to another without taking time to unpack from the last relationship.  

    This marriage would have ended too if I hadn’t learned that I can’t change others, the only person I have control over is myself.  

    I started reading books on spirituality to personal development, including books on personal relationships.  I started asking myself questions like, “what or how have I contributed to the marriage breakdowns?”  Looking back now, I realized, I really didn’t know what love was. Learning about self-care was an eye-opener!   

    During that time in my life, I started to learn more about what I liked and didn’t like. I learned about forgiveness not only for my ex-husbands but for myself.  I learned that life is as good as our current mindset.  Change your mindset and watch your life change too. 

    I would offer this advice, to be better for others, the journey to be better must begin from within you first. (I know it sounds backwards!)

    Here’s are a few ideas I would like to offer:

    1. Learn about self-care is all about.
    2. Practice forgiveness with others and yourself
    3. Find out what triggers your emotions. Pay attention to what makes you mad, sad, happy, and peaceful. Don’t suppress then, feel them all.
    4. Read and learn. Focus on expanding your mind.  Others have been where you are and can offer great insight or at least a different perspective on how to look at things.
    5. Extend grace to others as well as yourself.  We are all doing the best we can with our current state of mind. One of my favorite quotes “When you know better, you do better.” -Maya Angelou.

    I would like to close out with this, take time out to figure out who you are and what you like.  If we don’t take time out to learn about ourselves, no one else will do it for us.  Remember, when you change for the better, life will reflect that change back to you.

    I also would love to learn more about who you are and what you do. Feel free to connect with me through a Meetup group.

    1. Confident Strides Women’s Empowerment Network https://bit.ly/CSWENMeetup
    2. Confident Strides Personal Development Network Group https://bit.ly/CSPDNMeetup
    3. Confident Strides Women’s Professional Network https://bit.ly/CSWPNMeetup

    Quote Source: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/better-person

    To connect with me: https://linktr.ee/confidentstrides

  • How to Become Powerful: Using Creativity and Personal Development Together

    How to Become Powerful: Using Creativity and Personal Development Together

    “Creativity takes courage. ” ― Henri Matisse

    How does creativity promote your personal development?- Quora

    I would like to think that creativity and personal development go hand in hand. Creativity is being able to look at things from different angles and coming up with new possibilities. Personal development is taking a deeper dive into who and what we can do. 

    Think about the last time you got a new phone.  When I got my phone, the first thing I wanted to know was the basics; how to make phone calls, how to text and check my email.  The more I got into using and learning how to work my phone worked, the more I start playing around with new features and new apps.  I got more comfortable and more confident in exploring the possibilities of what my phone could do. Now I make videos and some much more.

    We are like smart phones, without personal development and creativity in our lives, we are just scratching the surface of our capabilities. Personal development and creativity together, help us to realize we are more powerful than we think, and we stop scratching the surface and explore the possibilities. Personal development gets you to start asking questions like what else can I do or what if I try this? 

    I would like to offer those who are starting to dig deeper into who they are and what they can do a few simple reminders:

    1. Enjoy the ride. The road on the self-discovery journey is a tricky one but it can also be a fun one. I like reading my old journals and seeing just how far my mindset has shifted. 
    2. Trust the process. It may be hard and lonely at times so remember the caterpillar wouldn’t become a butterfly without the metamorphizing. Can you imagine what beauty we would miss out if the caterpillar resisted. 
    3. You are not alone. There are many others out here learning and growing each day. Find other like-minded individuals to surround yourself with.
    4. Stay Curious. Creativity can’t be used up.  The more you use it the more you get in return so the personal development journey can be a lifelong discovery of endless wonder.

    I would like to close with this, you are more powerful than you know. Don’t stop at the basics, unleash your full potential, and take that dive. You are a gift, and the world is calling on you!

    I would love to learn more about who you are and what you do. Feel free to connect with me through a Meetup group.

    1. Confident Strides Women’s Empowerment Network https://bit.ly/CSWENMeetup
    2. Confident Strides Personal Development Network Group https://bit.ly/CSPDNMeetup
    3. Confident Strides Women’s Professional Network https://bit.ly/CSWPNMeetup

    Quote Source: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag?utf8=✓&id=creativity

    To connect with me: https://linktr.ee/confidentstrides

  • Effective Lifestyle Habit Change Starts with Turning on Your GPS System First

    Effective Lifestyle Habit Change Starts with Turning on Your GPS System First

    “I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.” ― Douglas Adams

    How do I change lifestyle habits?- Quora

    Before I think about creating or eliminating lifestyle habits, I like to see where I am on my road map called life.

    The end of the year or a birthday, or any other lifechanging event is always a great time to take a closer look and see if we are still on the path for what you want out of life.  Don’t just look at what you want from your career but what you want personally and spiritually.  Are you still in alignment with those goals and dreams or have they changed?  That’s when you can figure out what you need to add or eliminate from your life.

    What I wanted in life when I was twenty isn’t what I wanted when I reached my forties.  My lifestyle had changed that means my habits had to change too.

    For example, I got serious about my health when I had a grandchild.  You think it would have been important throughout my life but realizing I wanted to be around when my grandchild turns 20 was a like a “aha” moment.  I started questioning what I must do to reach that dream or at least head in that direction. 

    I think any lifestyle change must begin with taking time for self-reflection.  By know where you are on the Life map, you can then set your GPS with intention. With intention, you will gain the clarity and focus you need to stay on your path. You will recognize what habits are taking you towards your destination and what ones are taking you away.

    Here are some suggestions on how to reset or recalibrate you GPS system if you’ve gotten off track:

    1. Unplug – Disconnect from the distractions that are keeping you from hearing the navigation.  Take time to reconnect with who you are. Take up walking, running, or cycling, or something that gets you out of your head and back in balance.
    2. Trust the process- Many times we think we know the way and don’t trust the insight that we are receiving from within.  We look for external guidance instead of learning how to turn up the GPS volume. We turn it down or off if we don’t like what we are getting.
    3. Become a lifetime learner.  We are not alone in our struggles. By reading and learning from others, we cut our learning curve in half the time.  Time is too short to be going around in circles.
    4. Determine what’s right for you. This goes with the first suggestion. The more you find out what’s right for you, you begin to do what’s right for you and turning off the external noise of the world gets a little bit easier. 
    5. Celebrate how far you have come.  This is a life road map, so enjoy the ride!

    When you start with knowing who you are and what you want, take a step everyday towards it.  This is a life journey not a life sprint.

    I would love to learn more about who you are and what you do. Feel free to connect with me through a Meetup group.

    1. Confident Strides Women’s Empowerment Network https://bit.ly/CSWENMeetup
    2. Confident Strides Personal Development Network Group https://bit.ly/CSPDNMeetup
    3. Confident Strides Women’s Professional Network https://bit.ly/CSWPNMeetup

    Quote Source: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/navigation

    To connect with me: https://linktr.ee/confidentstrides