Tag: personal experience

What Are the Bennie’s?

Today on my morning run I was able to log in 6.62 miles. It’s a personal best for me so far. I started running about three months ago. I started running from my house to the local park which I estimate to be about one mile from my home. I focused on either running to the park and then walking the rest of my normal trail. I have been an avid walker for over five years. I believed as many other walkers that walking is better than running. I could list a number of reasons to support my thinking.

I used to run cross country in high school. I grew up in the northeast corner of Connecticut where our high school mascot was a mountaineer. I loved running the mountain trails but I was not a fan of running it self. I still don’t think I love running, I just love the benefits or the “bennies” that it provides.

Thinking about it, the benefits of the things we do is what drives us to do them. It’s truly not the activity it self. So when it comes to making changes in your lives, the one true question you first have to answer is, what is the benefit, or the bennie’s, I am getting out of this? Without taking the time to reflect on each habit or change you want to make, it’s pointless without figuring out what it is that your are looking to gain or to eliminate.

Think about this as we bring 2019 to a close. Now is the time to reflect on what is working and what is not. Design your life the way you want to, not by the opinions of others! What benefits are you looking to gain in the coming year?

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December 5, 2019
Show Up First

Show up authentically and synergy will meet you there. ― Sanjo Jendayi

I started running about three months ago. I had been an avid walker for more that five years or more. I really have no clue as to where this is taking me. I simply love being out in nature and it’s a great way for me to find clarity and creativity.

What inspired me to start running? Well the same park I walk at is the same location that one of the local high school’s cross country team practices at. I remember on one Sunday morning, I saw a young man out running in the cross country course by himself. Wow!! This young man didn’t wait until the coach told him to practice or the rest of the team to be there, he just went out and did it.

We don’t need to get other people’s approval to do and be who we are. It’s nice to have a cheering section but sometimes the fans won’t show up until we do. What have you been wanting to do? Don’t wait, be like that young runner and go for it!

Photo Source: click here / Quote Source: click here

November 27, 2019
It’s Not That Important

It’s not that Important” were the words being shouted from the backseat of the car the other day when my husband and I were “discussing” where to place the cell phone in order to hear the navigational directions. I will admit that I got “caught up” in the discussion because I was trying to make my opinion known. Of course my husband had his own idea on where he wanted to put the phone since he was driving.

My three year old granddaughter interjected herself into the conversation by saying “its not that important”. The thing that caught my attention, besides this little person yelling from the backseat and the fact that she couldn’t quite say the word “important” was when I stopped to think about what was happening at that moment, she was right. I had let my ego step in.

I laugh now because it took the words of a three year old to remind me that sometimes the little things we make the biggest fuss over are the little things that can begin to tear a relationship apart. The best thing we can do is stop, take a deep breath and ask yourself, just how important is it for me to be right?

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November 7, 2019
I Won the Jeep!

For anyone who has followed my blogs over the past few years knows that I had an auto accident in 2013. It was a rainy Halloween night when I lost control of my BMW and hit the cement divider wall and totaled my car. My BMW was my retirement gift to myself. My husband and I were going through some financial challenges at the time and my car was the only thing I refused to part with.

I remember the evening well because it was the beginning of my spiritual journey. That night of the accident was when I first noticed the tiny whispers of the Universe. As I sat in the back seat of the police car, I remember a calming presence within that was saying everything is going to be alright. I remember thinking “God, you have my attention now!”

Fast forward to 2019 and I am sitting in a huge convention center. My company is about to do a drawing for a 2019 Jeep Cherokee Trailhawk. As I watch the tickets being mixed up, I am thinking my chances of winning is not looking good. There must have be thousands of pink raffle tickets being mixed up in the large clear rotating raffle drum. But I decided not to focus on that, instead I started thinking about how it would feel to be seated in the Jeep, taking in the new car smell. I could hear them calling the numbers. I started thinking, I’m still in the running as they called off the first four numbers. By the 6th number, I was thinking, the winning number is really close to one of my four tickets I had. It wasn’t until they announced the name of the winner that it hit me… I won!

I believe that the Universe is always speaking to us. My accident in 2013 was a wake up call to what life is trying to get me to notice. I make it a practice to stay present and enjoy the beautiful blessing that surround me. I know this post can not express the sheer gratitude, faith and appreciation I have for such a loving, generous, and supportive Life Force, but what I want to say is Thank you!

May 20, 2019
Care to Dance?

I started taking salsa classes a few weeks ago. It’s the type of salsa that requires working with a partner. I am not usually the lead partner which has been a struggle for me. They teach us the basic steps and then when we are partnered up, I am to “mirror” my partner. Last week we had a practice session. I learned one of the most valuable lessons, not only to dancing, but in life.

As one of the gentleman asked me to dance, I informed him that is was my first lesson. He smiled and we started to dance. I focused on counting my steps and made lots of missteps and mistakes. My partner smiled and told me to close my eyes. He said feel the rhythm and trust me. I closed my eyes and I tried not to anticipate the steps I just listened to the beat and let my partner lead. It was so much fun! That’s when I understood:

“Life is the dancer and you are the dance.” -Eckhart Tolle

Maybe it is us who causes our own stumbles and missteps. Perhaps we need to learn to let go of our need for control, close our eyes and listen to the rhythm. Life is always asking you, “Care to Dance?”

Quote Source: Eckhart Tolle Quote

May 6, 2019
Residue

Have you ever come a cross a person and once you leave you notice the feelings or thoughts that remain after your encounter with them. Like for instance you have people who bring up feeling of peace. you may have people who bring out the excitement of possibilities. We even have those people who are like hurricanes that stir up feeling of anxiety and chaos. I call this, residue.

Like this we encounter, we also leave behind feeling and thoughts on others. It wasn’t until I became more aware of my own conscious thoughts that I realize that we all are leaving a bit of ourselves everywhere we go. We have the power to decide what kind of residue we want to leave others. Granted, they may not always receive it as such.

I learned through meditation that we can set our intentions daily and choose to be either the lighthouse or the storm. What kind of residue due you want to leave? The kind that people enjoy or the kind that people want to wash off.

December 24, 2018
All Present

I honestly think we can learn something new each day. The biggest challenge is usually staying present in the moment to notice. I started getting out and reconnecting with friends. What I often finding myself doing before we met up was worrying about what were going to say. It’s at those moments when you have to tell that little voice inside to “be quiet.” If you are present in the company of others, you can always find something to talk about.

What does it mean to be present? That’s always a great question when people ask me. It’s giving the other person you undivided attention. I always like to define what it is by stating what it is not. Let me give you some examples. Being present is not worrying about what you could be doing with someone else. Being present is not scrolling through your phone when someone is sitting with you. being present is not thinking about what you are going to do once you leave. Being present is saying to the person you are with, that they are important enough to listen and let them be heard.

Once I learned what it meant to be present, my marriage and all of my other relations greatly improved. The power is in your hands. The one thing that is always in your control is yourself.

December 17, 2018
Share Your Music

One of the best messages I read on the message board out side of the gym was “the only bad workout is the one you didn’t do”. That message is not only great for workouts but anything you choose not to do in life. The only bad book is the one you choose not to write, or the only bad song is the one you choose not to record.

I think about the messages I come across and can listen to now that’s available through YouTube. Whatever you have an interest in, you can find. I listen to speakers that no longer are with us but had great messages to share. Think about what you have been through in your life. Only you can share that story because only you have lived that life.

We all have a message and a story to share. I think you do the world a dis-service by not sharing you story. You might be the one with the cure for cancer. Don’t leave this thing we call life with your song still in you. Share your music with the world.

December 10, 2018
Plan Your Life
I find that the more disciplined I am in certain areas of my life, the more freedom I find in other areas. I schedule my daily calendar with habits I want to maintain. For instance, I try and practice daily meditation, reading and journaling. Just maintaining the calendar is a discipline. For the most part, I know in my head what I have on my calendar out in my head but I have found that having it to refer back to at times helps me to maintain those habits.

When I first started keeping a daily calendar, the purpose was to coordinate my daily activities around schedule appointment times with “clients.” The funny thing is, I didn’t have any clients. I slowly began to realize that the calendar wasn’t for scheduling time for others, it was for scheduling time for myself.

I learned three valuable lessons:
1. My calendar is a constant reminder to coordinate the kinds of habits I find important to living a happy and fulfilled life.
2. Schedule the kind of activities that will ensure that you DO what is important to you and for you.
3. If we don’t schedule time for what we want, we will never accomplish what we want because we think we don’t have time.
In the great words of the late Jim Rohn, “learn to work harder on yourself, than you do on the job.” With a calendar, it’s possible.
December 4, 2018
The Grumbles

Some of my hardest “NO” have been said to others in order to say “YES” to myself. I used to get mad and frustrated when people would always ask for favors. I would wonder why was the only one they seemed to call, and get pissed off about it. Those were little grumblings trying to get my attention. The one person I did not seem to get mad with was myself. It was ME who made these people feel comfortable in asking because I was the one always saying yes. I started noticing the feeling that were generated when I would say yes and realized I was the one who had all of the control.

I love the quote by Les Brown who says “if you like what you are getting, keep doing what you are doing” I did not like what I was getting. When I said yes to others, I was saying not to my happiness. I am definitely not saying that we should not help others but sometimes you have to step back and really examine what you are saying yes to. Are you helping or are you enabling? There is a difference.

Take time out before committing to anyone whether you are helping or enabling that person. For me, once I learned the difference, I decide more carefully what I will say “YES” to. The grumbling deep down inside yourself is trying to tell you something. Take a moment to listen.

November 26, 2018