Tag: self reflection

Effective Lifestyle Habit Change Starts with Turning on Your GPS System First
“I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.” ― Douglas Adams

How do I change lifestyle habits?- Quora

Before I think about creating or eliminating lifestyle habits, I like to see where I am on my road map called life.

The end of the year or a birthday, or any other lifechanging event is always a great time to take a closer look and see if we are still on the path for what you want out of life.  Don’t just look at what you want from your career but what you want personally and spiritually.  Are you still in alignment with those goals and dreams or have they changed?  That’s when you can figure out what you need to add or eliminate from your life.

What I wanted in life when I was twenty isn’t what I wanted when I reached my forties.  My lifestyle had changed that means my habits had to change too.

For example, I got serious about my health when I had a grandchild.  You think it would have been important throughout my life but realizing I wanted to be around when my grandchild turns 20 was a like a “aha” moment.  I started questioning what I must do to reach that dream or at least head in that direction.

I think any lifestyle change must begin with taking time for self-reflection.  By know where you are on the Life map, you can then set your GPS with intention. With intention, you will gain the clarity and focus you need to stay on your path. You will recognize what habits are taking you towards your destination and what ones are taking you away.

Here are some suggestions on how to reset or recalibrate you GPS system if you’ve gotten off track:
1. Unplug – Disconnect from the distractions that are keeping you from hearing the navigation. Take time to reconnect with who you are. Take up walking, running, or cycling, or something that gets you out of your head and back in balance.
2. Trust the process- Many times we think we know the way and don’t trust the insight that we are receiving from within. We look for external guidance instead of learning how to turn up the GPS volume. We turn it down or off if we don’t like what we are getting.
3. Become a lifetime learner. We are not alone in our struggles. By reading and learning from others, we cut our learning curve in half the time. Time is too short to be going around in circles.
4. Determine what’s right for you. This goes with the first suggestion. The more you find out what’s right for you, you begin to do what’s right for you and turning off the external noise of the world gets a little bit easier.
5. Celebrate how far you have come. This is a life road map, so enjoy the ride!
When you start with knowing who you are and what you want, take a step everyday towards it. This is a life journey not a life sprint.

I would love to learn more about who you are and what you do. Feel free to connect with me through a Meetup group.
1. Confident Strides Women’s Empowerment Network https://bit.ly/CSWENMeetup
2. Confident Strides Personal Development Network Group https://bit.ly/CSPDNMeetup
3. Confident Strides Women’s Professional Network https://bit.ly/CSWPNMeetup
Quote Source: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/navigation

To connect with me: https://linktr.ee/confidentstrides
December 24, 2021
Transformation Time: How to Become Smarter, More Creative, and Productive
“Let your creative and imaginative mind run freely; it will take you places you never dreamed of and provide breakthroughs that others once thought were impossible.” ― Idowu Koyenikan

How can one become smarter, more creative, productive, and intelligent during a lockdown?-Quora

Depending on the lens you to look through, a lockdown can be like the metamorphosis of a caterpillar to a butterfly. We have the time to learn more about who we are and what we want, if you choose to.

As with any time we deal with change, we may look fantastic from the outside, but the transformation from within feels gruesome deep inside. That’s because we don’t have the distractions that we are accustomed to. We don’t have the availability to run from our decisions.  We are forced to face reality head on. Unlike the caterpillar, we have the choice to use this time to transform into a butterfly.

During the lockdown, use this time to read, draw and rediscover dormant skills and talents that we have put to the side.  Creativity is not just for a select few, we all have a creative muscle in our body that just needs to be exercised more.  It’s like sleeping in a certain position for so long that our creativity fell asleep. That numbness will eventually dissipate.

Life doesn’t stop during a lockdown; it must be looked at from a different angle.

Suggestions on how to become smarter, more creative, and productive:
- Ask yourself what have you been putting off or too busy to do? Have you been wanted to read or exercise more? There are tons of internet sites where you can download e-books. Many trainers now offer online training programs.
- Boost your immune system by enjoying nature. It’s doesn’t cost a thing to go for a walk.
  - Walking also is a great way to relieve stress and relax your mind. If your mind is relaxed, it’s easier to gain clarity. With clarity, you can focus more on what’s important therefor making you more productive.
  - Walking is also a great way to let you mind explore ideas which gives you more creativity in solving problems.
- Use the downtime to write or journal. Explore what is coming up for you during this lockdown. Perhaps you’ll have enough material to write a book or publish a blog.
- Remember: Creativity can’t be used up, the more you use it the more you gain.
- One last thing you can do is, use your smart devices to reach out and talk with people. Replace a text or an email with a phone call. This helps you to realize that you are not alone, and you perhaps may make a new friend which you can visit once the world opens back up.
The lockdown may pose a physical limitation, but your imagination/creativity is limitless!

For more information on how a butterfly transforms https://www.zmescience.com/ecology/animals-ecology/how-caterpillar-turn-butterfly-0534534/

Quote Source: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/transformation

To connect with me: https://linktr.ee/confidentstrides
December 17, 2021
Cheers to a 30 Day Habit Run: How to Implement a New Habit
“Change might not be fast and it isn’t always easy. But with time and effort, almost any habit can be reshaped.” ― Charles Duhigg

How can we go 30 days with a new habit we want to make without interruption? – Quora

We commonly think we need to “add” a new habit but in truth we are looking to make a change in lifestyle. To implement change in your life, think about not only adding, but also consider, eliminating an old habit or modifying a current one. A moment of reflection always helps to implement and maintain a new habit or lifestyle change.

To implement change, begin by asking yourself questions like:
1. Why do I want to do this? Keep the answer in front of you. If you know why you want to do something, it will give to you the motivation to keep going.
2. What’s the benefit of adding this habit to my life? I don’t like walking in the cold, but I love the clarity and the peace it brings. The benefits sometimes outweigh the effort.
3. What would happen if I gave up on myself and my dream or goal? The pain of regret can provide motivation.
4. How will you feel? You are the only one who makes and breaks the rules. If you interrupt the habit, don’t beat yourself up. Give yourself grace. The biggest thing to celebrate is starting in the first place.
Here are a few suggestions you can do to help:
1. Check off the days you complete the new habit. It’s called “a Streak” or “Don’t Break the Chain”. It’s amazing how great you feel in keeping you habit and checking it off on your calendar is physical proof.
2. Buddy up with someone. I wanted to hit a goal in December, I partnered with someone who also had a goal they want to hit, and we held each other accountable.
3. Set a daily reminder. Use your smart devices as assistants.
4. Write about it. Journal your experience.
I wish everyone a successful lifestyle changes in the coming year!

Quote Source: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/habits

Here is an invitation to connect with me: https://linktr.ee/confidentstrides

We also just launched our new website where you can find out Youtube videos and Anchor podcast episodes in one location. Check it out here: https://confidentstrides.com
December 13, 2021
How To Be Productive in 2022: Conduct a Year End Review First
“Consider everything an experiment.” ― Corita Kent

How can one be productive? -Quora

As this year ends, I think it’s an excellent time to reflect on just how far we have come.  We focus so much on what we want to achieve that perhaps we don’t stop and realize that we are not the same person we were when the year started. There has been people and experiences that have changed us either for the good or the bad.  This is the time to reflect and see if what you are aiming for is still relevant. Do we need to readjust and realign our priorities?  Do we still feel the same way about these things?

In the military, we would call this time for reflection an After-Action Review or AAR for short.  This is when we would sit down and ask the participants what their experience was. Did we hit our objective?  Where did we come up short and what did we do right? What did you learn? To know is you are productive, you first need to know what the goal was that you were aiming for.

What is your target?

We can apply an AAR to weekly, monthly or year end events.  Did you hit your weekly, monthly, or year-end goal? What did we come up short on and what did we do right?  What have we learned? By taking time to see what worked and what didn’t we can now adjust our aim.

Being productive is only relevant in the terms to what you want to achieve and the kind of life you want to live.
1. Write down your dreams and goals. You can’t hit what you can’t see.
2. Evaluate the activity you engage in daily, weekly, monthly, and yearly. Are they in alignment with your core beliefs? Are they taking you to or away from your goals?
3. Reflect on what is working and what is not. Conduct an After-Action Review.
4. Adjust your aim and keep moving.
For 2022 to be productive for you, take a moment of reflection and see what your core values and beliefs are. Then you will know what kind of activities you need to incorporate or eliminate.

Quote Source: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/productivity

Here is an invitation to connect with me: https://linktr.ee/confidentstrides

We also just launched our new website where you can find out Youtube videos and Anchor podcast episodes in one location. Check it out here: https://confidentstrides.com
December 10, 2021
Noticing the Invisible Influences: Who Do We Let Run Through Our Minds?
It’s a little bit like Goldilocks. We don’t want to be the same as everybody else, but too different is also bad. We’re trying to walk the line between being similar and different. -Jonah Berger

Who are you giving permission to run through your mind?

We all of a circle of influence whether we know it or not. Some of us have smaller circles than other but they still operate in the same manner. They are the ones who influence our thoughts and behaviors. We are even influencers of others too.

I recently asked a networking group that I facilitate this very questions. I have to admit that I never really gave this question much thought until recently. In many of the self-discovery books, they often state that we become like the people we associate with on a daily basis. The more I ponder this thought, I do think it has some truth to it.

Many of the women in my networking group have written a book and are looking to create an online course. I also have had a desire to write a book but it’s been way down on the list. I also would like to create an online course, but again it’s been way down on the life goal list as well, until recently. I am starting to see pathway to achieving both the goal of writing a book and creating an online course.

I remember a few years ago, when I used to take my former neighbor to her doctor’s appointments and grocery shopping that she was a vegetarian. At that time, I started noticing that I became more aware about my meat consumption and at times considered cutting meat out of my diet.

What I like most about this question is that it makes you stop and take notice of who we grant access to influence our lives. These are the people who help us create the kind of life we want and accomplish the goals we want to achieve. They can either be helping you to achieve your dreams or hindering you. I definitely think it’s worth your time to take a closer look.

Here are some of my takeaways:
1. Pay attention to who you surround yourself with.
2. Notice how they affect your life. Do they help or hinder you from creating the kind of life you want? Do you like who you are becoming? Who do you need to be around more? or less?
3. Remember: You are awesome. Give yourself some Grace!
Here is an Amazon affiliate link for “Invisible Influence: The Hidden Forces that Shape Behavior” by Jonah Berger who I quoted in the beginning: https://amzn.to/3aB5YlR

I am also including an article I came across while I was writing this post that may explain more about how we make our decisions that also mentioned the book which is also my Quote Source: https://behavioralscientist.org/invisible-influence-how-other-people-think-for-you-and-why-thats-ok/

Join me on Meetup at https://bit.ly/CSPDNMeetup

Other ways to connect with me: https://linktr.ee/confidentstrides
October 22, 2021
Care to Dance?

I started taking salsa classes a few weeks ago. It’s the type of salsa that requires working with a partner. I am not usually the lead partner which has been a struggle for me. They teach us the basic steps and then when we are partnered up, I am to “mirror” my partner. Last week we had a practice session. I learned one of the most valuable lessons, not only to dancing, but in life.

As one of the gentleman asked me to dance, I informed him that is was my first lesson. He smiled and we started to dance. I focused on counting my steps and made lots of missteps and mistakes. My partner smiled and told me to close my eyes. He said feel the rhythm and trust me. I closed my eyes and I tried not to anticipate the steps I just listened to the beat and let my partner lead. It was so much fun! That’s when I understood:

“Life is the dancer and you are the dance.” -Eckhart Tolle

Maybe it is us who causes our own stumbles and missteps. Perhaps we need to learn to let go of our need for control, close our eyes and listen to the rhythm. Life is always asking you, “Care to Dance?”

Quote Source: Eckhart Tolle Quote

May 6, 2019
Grandma Has Got You

I love watching my granddaughter learn new things. She watches my husband and I so closely that she can usually pick up and copy what we do rather quickly. The word fear has no meaning to her at the ripe age of 18 months. I take her to the park and let her climb the playground play set. She climbs and jumps and runs with the big kids. I follow and closely standby just in case she reaches out for help.

Just watching her play has taught me so much. Life is about enjoying the moment. I used to get caught up in thinking about past events or stressing over future ones that I missed the gift in being present. Life looks more vivid, more colorful when I stop and reflect on what is important at the moment. I don’t what to miss one smile, one laugh or one reach of my granddaughter’s hand. Vow to take time each day to reflect on what’s important, there is a gift to be seen.

Photo Source: click here.

April 23, 2018
Facing Reality

With every action there is an equal or opposite reaction. In many instances, so many of us can find fault in the behavior of others but rarely take a moment to ask ourselves “how did my behavior contribute to this?” It was a hard reality for me to face and I didn’t always like the reflection that I got back but I was able to see things in me that I could work on. Change begins from within and we all have the same opportunity to be the change we wish to see.

Photo credit: Chris Perez Photography

May 12, 2017
Mode of Transportation

Life will offer up an answer to our prayers but not send it the way we expect it. Here is another way to look at it, we ask for a ride to our desired destination but because we don’t like the vehicle choice to get there, we turn down the ride. Keep in mind, the main objective is to get from point A to point B.

Photo credit: click here.

January 9, 2017
They Mean Well

I stopped sharing most of my dreams with others not because I don’t think that they will not support me, but in actuality, their form of support is not helping but rather hindering success. I had someone say to me “be careful because things might not work out the way you want them to and you’ll get disappointed.” I thought to myself, isn’t that called life?

Photo credit: click here.

January 4, 2017