Sweet N Social

Tag: self-trust

  • How Choosing Joy Over Hustle Changed Everything for Me

    How Choosing Joy Over Hustle Changed Everything for Me

    There was a time when I believed that showing up meant always being available. I thought it was necessary for meetings, for others, and for opportunity. But what I’ve learned since then is that showing up for myself is just as important.

    Back in 2021, I skipped a networking meeting to go running. I even logged in, ready to join, but the link wouldn’t let me in. I took it as a sign — not of failure, but of redirection. So I laced up and ran 6.7 miles instead. As I ran, I thought about how long it had taken to build that habit. Why was I so quick to drop something that nourishes me for something that drains me?

    That question has followed me through the years. It showed up again when I missed a Zoom meeting. I was exploring Muir Woods while house sitting in San Francisco this year. It appeared again when I chose to wander a new city instead of logging into another call. In each instance, I realized I wasn’t skipping responsibility; I was redefining it.

    In a world that celebrates the hustle, choosing joy can look like weakness. But joy is what keeps me in motion. Networking feeds my business, but walking, running, and exploring feed my spirit. I’ve learned that both matter — but only one keeps me whole.

    Sometimes, the real work isn’t in the meeting I miss; it’s in the moment I choose to live.

    And I’m reminded of something my kind neighbor, Miss Carol, once said:

    “I am choosing to be an active participant in my life.”

    That’s what my guiding light has always been about. It is not just about surviving the pace of life. It is about consciously walking in it.

    Reflection Prompt

    What does being an active participant in your life look like today?

    Author’s Note

    This reflection began as a 2021 journal entry about skipping a meeting to run. It has grown into a reminder about alignment and permission. I have been learning the same lesson in different ways. Each version of me — the runner, the entrepreneur, the walker — learns that joy is not a detour. It’s direction.

    By Tonia Tyler | #ConfidentStrides | Sweet N Social

    If this reflection spoke to you, follow Sweet N Social for more stories. These stories focus on living with intention, walking in confidence, and redefining what success really looks like.

  • Fraud or Foundation? Honoring the Voice Notes We Leave Behind

    Fraud or Foundation? Honoring the Voice Notes We Leave Behind

    For a long time, I carried a quiet fear. I thought that if I didn’t physically write every idea, then it somehow didn’t count. I worried that using a shortcut like voice notes or technology made me less of a writer. It even made me feel like a fraud.

    But here’s what I’ve come to realize. Those voice notes, those reflections recorded mid-walk or late at night, are not shortcuts. They’re foundations. They capture the rhythm of thought in motion. They include the breath between ideas. There are pauses of reflection and the spark before the edit.

    For years, my inbox filled with voice recordings that I never touched again. I saw them as unfinished business, evidence that I wasn’t disciplined enough to “really write.” But looking back now, I see them differently. They were seeds waiting for their season.

    And sometimes, seeds don’t sprout right away. Sometimes you need the right soil, the right time — or even the right technology.

    I once read that some dreams don’t come alive until the right person is born. Alternatively, the right tool might need to be invented to carry them forward. Maybe my voice notes were waiting for me to grow. They needed me to become the version of myself who could finally bring them to life.

    Now, when I use transcription tools or AI, it’s not to replace my words; it’s to honor them. To give them room to breathe, structure, and live beyond my phone’s inbox. What once felt like fraud now feels like wisdom — a layered process unfolding in its own divine timing.

    Reflection Prompt:

    What ideas or recordings have been sitting quietly in your inbox or journal, waiting for their right season to bloom?

    Author’s Note:

    This reflection came from revisiting years of voice notes I once dismissed as unfinished or unused. I now see them as part of my creative foundation. They are proof that ideas don’t need to arrive fully formed to be valid. This piece is for anyone who’s been hard on themselves for not creating the “right” way. Your process counts. Your rhythm matters.

    If this reflection spoke to you, follow Sweet N Social for future entries on creativity, courage, and walking through change.

    By Tonia Tyler | #ConfidentStrides | Sweet N Social

  • Why “Push” Marketing Never Felt Right to Me

    Why “Push” Marketing Never Felt Right to Me

    I finally found the language for how I work.

    For a long time, I felt slightly out of step with how marketing and visibility are often talked about.

    Not because I didn’t understand the advice.
    I did.

    Post more.
    Be consistent.
    Stay visible.
    Push your message ahead.

    I followed those rules when I needed to. I learned them. I respected them.
    But something about them never settled in my body.

    It wasn’t resistance.
    It was misalignment.

    Recently, I realized I didn’t lack discipline or clarity — I lacked language.

    Now I have it.

    I work in pull energy, not push energy.

    I prefer to choose when I engage, and I prefer to create in ways that allow others to choose too. I like content people seek out intentionally, not content that arrives uninvited. I trust resonance more than reach. Presence more than pressure.

    This shows up everywhere in how I move:

    • I gravitate toward platform-based writing rather than inbox delivery
    • I use text and silence instead of talking to the camera
    • I walk ideas into clarity rather than forcing output
    • I create slowly, letting things find their moment

    For a long time, I questioned this.

    Was I avoiding growth?
    Resisting sales?
    Making things harder than necessary?

    What I see now is simpler.

    Push strategies aren’t wrong — they’re just more visible.

    They dominate conversations because they’re louder, easier to measure, and faster to scale. That doesn’t make them universal. It just makes them familiar.

    Pull energy exists too.
    It’s quieter.
    It responds instead of initiates.
    And because it doesn’t shout, it often goes unnamed.

    The more I sat with this, the more it reminded me of how growth works in nature.

    An acorn doesn’t push itself into becoming an oak tree.
    It doesn’t announce its growth or force its timing.
    It holds everything it needs — and pulls what’s required from its environment when the conditions are right.

    That’s how I work.

    This isn’t a rejection of marketing.
    It’s an understanding of self.

    Finding language for this hasn’t changed how I move — it’s helped me trust how I already do.

    Like an acorn, I trust what’s already inside me to know how to grow

    Reflection Prompt

    Where in your work or life are you pushing simply because it’s visible? What shift if you trusted a quieter, more natural way of growing?

    Author’s Note

    This reflection came from noticing my own resistance — not to marketing itself, but to how loudly it’s often framed.

    Writing this helped me realize something important. I wasn’t doing anything wrong. I was simply working in a way that aligns with my nature. Naming that brought relief, clarity, and a deeper trust in my rhythm.

    I’m sharing it here for anyone who has felt similar but didn’t yet have the words.

    If this reflection resonated with you, follow Sweet N Social for more stories. Explore creativity, build confidence, and find your rhythm in everyday moments.

    If you want the audio version of these insights, join me on Confident Strides: The Podcast. Every story becomes a moment in motion there.

    By Tonia Tyler | #ConfidentStrides | Sweet N Social

  • Why I Needed Permission From Myself — Not the Technology

    Why I Needed Permission From Myself — Not the Technology

    I used to be afraid of tools like ChatGPT. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I thought, What if it steals my information? That fear came from not knowing enough. It also stemmed from a deeper place. It was the kind that whispers, this space wasn’t made for you.

    As a Black woman, I’ve learned that hesitation often comes from history. It stems from being told to be careful. We are advised not to take up too much space and to play it safe. But as I sat with that thought, something shifted.

    I started remembering those TV shows where wealthy people spoke into the air. Their digital assistant answered like a modern-day “Jeeves”: “Would you like me to write that for you?” For so long, technology like that seemed reserved for someone else — someone with privilege or power.

    But the truth is, we have that power too. Everyday people — creatives, caregivers, teachers, entrepreneurs, dreamers — can use these same tools to imagine, build, and grow. It’s not about status. It’s about perspective.

    When I reframed my fear, I realized this: technology isn’t stealing my creativity. It’s helping me organize, amplify, and honor it. It’s giving shape to ideas that once stayed trapped in my head or hidden in my notes.

    AI has become a quiet creative space for me — a place to process, brainstorm, and write freely. It’s not replacing me; it’s reflecting me back to myself.

    Sometimes, the real work isn’t learning how to use new tools. It’s learning to trust ourselves enough to use them.

    Reflection Prompt:

    Where are you still hesitating because of fear? What might happen if you reframed that fear as an invitation?

    Author’s Note:

    This reflection began as a simple thought during one of my quiet walks. I realized how often fear hides behind unfamiliar things. For years, I kept ideas locked in my voice notes, too afraid they weren’t “real writing.” Using technology became part of my healing process. It served as a reminder that creativity doesn’t have to be perfect. It just has to be honest. What once felt like a threat has turned into a trusted companion for clarity and growth.

    By Tonia Tyler | #ConfidentStrides | Sweet N Social

    If this reflection spoke to you, follow Sweet N Social for future entries on creativity, courage, and walking through change.

    #ReframeFear #CreativityInMotion #GrowthInMotion #SweetNSocial #ConfidentStrides