“There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.” ― Paulo Coelho
Are we giving ourselves permission to fail?
I don’t think we do. If we gave ourselves permission to fail, just imaging how much more compassionate we could be with others. We could see that we are all just trying to do the best with our current mindsets.
I recently took some time to reflect back on some of my life experiences and realized, I have failed a lot along the way but it didn’t mean I was a failure. Being a two time divorced woman, I now realize my previous marriages helped me to become the woman I am today. There were things within me that I needed to face and address if I wanted my third marriage to work. I like the quote, “what we resist will persist.” When my current marriage hit a rocky patch a few years ago, my first instinct was to put all the blame on my husband. I considered myself the victim and could find plenty of evidence to back up my claim of how bad my husband treated me. At this time in my life, I had started reading more books on self-discovery. I would take long walks through the park and just think and my mind got curious about my role in this contractual agreement we called a marriage.
The first thing I had to do, was to forgive myself. I learned to give myself a little more grace and become a little bit more loving with myself. My defense mechanism had always been to find all the wrong in my husband without considering putting the spotlight on me. There were some hard truths I had to face about myself.
I would not saying that my previous marriages would have worked out had I taken the deeper dive into myself before then, but I am thankful for the lessons that they taught me. I don’t hold any ill will towards my exes because I know, like me, they were doing the best they knew.
So, back to main point: learning to give ourselves permission to fail, here are my takeaways:
- Commit to becoming a lifetime learner. Learn who you are and what to like and dislike.
- Be willing to explore new things. Life is what you make of it.
- If you fail at something, don’t quit, keep trying. Become like a scientist, take inventory of what worked and figure out what didn’t then go back to the drawing board.
- You are awesome. Give yourself some Grace!
Quote Source: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/failure
I am including an Amazon Affiliate link to one of the books that helped my through my rough patch. It’s titled, “The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work” by John Gottman: https://amzn.to/3vfYDSe
In life ,we can get so caught up in the opinions of others. We worry that we are not doing the “right” thing. What I and so many others fail to recognize is what feels “right” to you is not always going to feel “right” for someone else. That’s the beauty of life, because their life purpose or path is not for you and vice versa.
Some of the best things in life happen when you least expect it. That’s the joy of staying open minded to new ideas, new concepts and new people. You don’t grow when you stay enclosed with the same thought patterns and social circles. Each new thing is an opportunity to grow either spiritually, mentally or emotionally. I have in the past said “what’s the worst thing that could happen?”, now I ask “what’s the best?”
Sweet N Social 